If you’re in the market for a new mala and just can’t decide between the rose quartz and the gilted logo of a major brand of yoga clothing, then this is your lucky day. Hear ye, hear ye…you can now purchase your very own Lululemon Practice Patience Mala for $108 which includes such beautiful features as white howlite beads to help you overcome self-criticism and brown rudraksha seeds to increase clarity. PLUS a golden Lululemon pendant will soothe your concerns about straying from your label whore status (this has nothing to do with yoga, anyone can be a loyal and dedicated label whore, and most of us are at some point in our consumerly lives), which is replaced by the silky “menthol” tassel if you’d rather do the work and just tell people you got it from Lululemon along with the rest of your wardrobe.
But none of this is that outstanding or outrageous. The real gold is in the always amazing customer reviews about the mala, and the ‘Mean Girls’ Jezebel post making fun of all of it. “These $108 Lululemon Meditation Beads Seem Worth It” the headline reads sarcastically.
We have news, though.
Yes, Lululemon wants you to pay $108 for a mala, and we’re not saying it’s right or wrong, but it’s not uncommon — look around and you’ll find plenty of handmade malas are around $100+. Lulu didn’t even make the malas themselves, they partnered with Mala Collective who sells malas for, you guessed it, $108. Are supposed to expect lulu to offer discounts now? Sillies.
And yes, people choose particular beads and stones for certain purposes like clarity, strength, and love (this is not unusual and quite frankly it’s no weirder than sports superstitions). And maybe some people do get a little too googley-eyed when it comes to anything and everything Lululemon thrusts into their shop for mass consumption. But crazy as it sounds, the lulus don’t seem to be as offensive as usual…well, besides the egregious gag-inducing logo dangle.
We find it weird to be defending the luluheads on this one, but mala beads really aren’t new and nor are they something you’d usually pick up for 20 bucks. Still, people are not so pleased about the price (ironically, since the clothing is so expensive to begin with…??) and have let their voice be heard via the product reviews. And if you know anything about Lululemon customer reviews, reading through them is often like taking a strange luon-infused trip through yoga-lala-land.
Here’s one review from SADMALA, amazingly titled “Cried”:
I bought the mala beads to help my compassion and my work out spirit. I was so excited. I wore them to the gym, but all of my work out buddies laughed at me.
I don’t feel the spirit. This did not help my life. $100 wasted plus the boxes of tissues I had to buy. The tassle even fell off, which was my favourite part.
And another from LULUFANEDMONTON1973:
Let’s not pass any judgement on LLL or people that prefer to meditate with more of an exquisite collections. Not sure if the parallel is appropriate, but why some people buy diamond encrusted crosses while others are content with wooden ones?
How about the ones that are against this item just don’t buy it and whoever needs to meditate, meditates with whichever works for them.
Yes, no judgement. Also, these mala beads are SO far from diamond-encrusted crosses. You want to get real fancy and all sorts of wrong? Check out this diamond and bone encrusted Buddha mala for $650. Yes, diamonds AND bone.
Another comment from LADYOGA adds the warm and fuzzy one love:
I love them…they are beautiful and I feel very zen when I wear and use them. They calm me down and help me focus on the moment. A tad pricy but love, love them. Not sure why the other reviews are so negative. They must not be using their beads for the intended use. Peace and Love
Peace and love y’all.
But ZOEYBUTT seemed to sum it up best:
I think if you have an issue with the price point, simply don’t buy it as there are other malas out there for less money, but no need to bring in any negativity around it. It’s like buying the pricey Lulu yoga pants vs. the inexpensive, but still stylish, Target brand. Everyone pays for what they personally find value in.
And Lululemon, of course, would love for you to find enough value in their products to shell out $300 for mala beads, yoga pants and a couple pairs of sweat-wicking underwear. Actually, replace the logo pendant with the tassel and these malas are probably the coolest, least lulu thing they sell. Though if you want our opinion, you might do better finding your own personal mala beads that speak to you elsewhere, no strings attached and likely cheaper.