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Abercrombie’s ‘Perfect Butt’ Yoga Pants (for Skinny Photoshopped Aliens)

in Business of Yoga, YD News

Abercrombie & Fitch joins the yoga clothing game, and $31 billion womens active wear market, with a less than human, Syms-like Pixar pixie with toothpicks for legs. Alas, their yoga pants will give you the “perfect butt” no matter where you’re going. Like the mall or a bar mitzvah. Sigh.Nevermind that they only come in sizes small – large, with large measuring a 29 – 30.5 inch waist and 39 – 40.5 inch hips. Thank goodness the population coming in under those valuations will have ‘tocks perfecto, while the rest of us must continue drudging through the cereal aisle forever destined for woefully flawed butt cheeks.

Besides the fact that we’re fascinated a pair of yoga pants can perfect any part of us, we’re frustrated that a clothing company infamous for sex-driven eye candy ads has to assault the yoga world with impossible promises and unrealistic body images, though safe to say we’re not surprised.

The catch in all this buttfoonery? A&F’s pants are marginally less than a lot of other options on the market. At $28-48 you get no sweat-wicking magic, but a cotton/spandex blend much like, say, American Apparel, or what you’ll find at your local Target.

They’ve even copied the Lululemon color striped waistband band, as many predecessors have opted to do, for stylish flair. Ah, but we can ignore all that. Why? Because all we care about is the perfect butt, because duh, that’s why we do yoga.

Not an Abercrombie fan? Don’t worry, little teen sibling store Hollister has your perfect skinny fit for the 14-18 year old lot. Literally, the exact same pants, just with a different logo. It disturbs us we feel some fraction of relief they’ve toned down the butt talk to “awesome” rather than “perfect” for minors.

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29 comments… add one
  • Yet another company jumping on the yoga bandwagon – when will it all end……

  • Molly

    Gross. And if this is the “perfect” butt, I’ll take mine instead, thank you very much.

  • Ah, I guess I will have to resign myself to Abercrombie’s implication that my butt can never be perfect.

    On the plus side, it serves to remind me that the “perfect” pants are the ones that fit my butt, not the other way around.

  • why should this surprise anyone when being skinny and having the “perfect” anything is emphasized in advertising including yoga clothes advertising? the bottom line is that women, including yoga women, buy into it. Some by choice, others who don’t know any better, by conditioning.

    I had a college athlete as a private student over the summer. What she told me about how the coaches (Big 10 school) tell healthy, fit star female athletes that they are too fat and need to lose weight was an eye opener. and appalling.

  • you know, i tried for a few sporadic moments to try and say something clever, but failed to also then not sound like i was buying into just doing a “cute” response –

    so i’ll pass, i think ya’ll are saying it all anyways…

    that and the subtitle : (for Skinny Photoshopped Aliens) 😉

  • This stuff keeps me awake!

    Thanks – Matt

  • miss bee

    butts aside, where are her thighs!?!?!

  • Ryan

    What about the guys? Is there anyone able to make shorts that will make my yoga bulge look perfect?

    • David D

      Sure, as long as the shorts come with Photoshop, like the butt-pants ad does.

  • amazing post! It made me laugh- and its so true! I recently wanted to write about the same topic and ended up writing about Victoria secret’s most loved yoga pants that are supposed to make your bum look super sexy. same category!

  • jake

    They look so sexxy

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