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Santa Bikram Concedes His Love of Shopping for Junk and Speaking the Truth

in YD News

bikram_as_santa_jesusCanada’s National Post caught up with the Santa of Yoga* himself, ‘Don’ Bikram Choudhury, fresh off another one of his sold-out speaking appearances. (He describes himself as the “busiest man in the world” which we all know is Santa Claus!) ‘Tis the season for giving (and receiving), so what did the jolly fella of megaton atomic “Silver Bells” have to say about holiday shopping?

“It takes six hours,” the Los Angeles-based yoga mogul said, before laughing: “And I buy all the junk. I love it, you know?”

More Rolexes and Ferraris for everyone! Bikram also dishes on why asking for private sessions will put you on the naughty list:

“They have to listen to the dialogue. So 90 minutes, first time in your life, your brain is free from the rest of the world. You relax. That is not possible privately.”

“This is the way I run my kingdom: my way or the highway,” he said in a tone that leaves little room for dispute. “I don’t listen to anybody. You need my help: Come to me, shut up, forget who you are. I will take care of you. And I do my job.”

In your face Madonna! No privates from the Don, not even for her Madgesty. Besides, that repeated dialogue would get a lttle awkward mano-a-Madge, wouldn’t you say?

Well, if there’s one thing we know about Poppa Bikram it’s that he’s completely unapologetic, mostly of his big mouth, which he reiterates for us once again,

“I have the biggest and the longest mouth in the world,” he said. “Everybody’s scared of my mouth. You know why? I speak the truth.”

Now, just for argument’s sake, you know who else has a big mouth and claims to speak the truth? Rush Limbaugh!  (and our big sister who told us Santa was real, but that’s another story). One could say the truth speaks for itself.

*Dear Santa Bikram Claus – do big mouths bring Yoga to the Olympics? Maybe next Christmas!

[National Post]

yogadork photo illustration

EarlierBikram Choudhury: Break the Law, Race Your Ferrari!

Yoga ‘Don’ Bikram Choudhury Calls American Yoga ‘Fucked Up Circus’

Competitive Yoga: Vicious or Vindicated? Ask Bikram

16 comments… add one
  • So, Bikram is the Rush Limbaugh of the yoga world…that makes an almost frightening amount of sense…though I can’t exactly pictured old Rush going through a vinyasa…

  • what an idiot.

    I speak the truth, too.

  • laluna

    I realize how un-yogic this is of me, but…what an a$$hat.

  • I have no words, he certainly awakens some powerful negativity within me that I thought yoga may have tamed… but oh no, I am still very human

  • Hey, easy there. He keeps a lot of us yoga satirists in business.

  • HA ha, yes, that is very true

  • I liked your post so much I linked to it, hope you dont mind 🙂

  • I’m struggling not to say anything negative, but COME ON!!!!! Egotistical much?

    Also, the above pic? OUCH! I’m all for teachers helping the posture, but that looks dangerous to me.

  • Common, YogaDawg.

    What could you possibly add to Bikram’s ridiculous parody of himself!

    Bob Weisenberg

  • I practice a very strenuous hybrid yoga with a teacher trained in a number of traditions. I also frequent Bikram studios from time to time. There is one thing I really like about Bikram. You go into a certified Bikram class with a sore neck or a pulled muscle and you leave feeling much better. To me that is a much more powerful real-world testimonial than all this “I was a paraplegic or had terminal cancer” stuff. There is a fine line between respecting your Guru and deifying him.

  • You know what the P.R. people say: the only bad publicity is NO publicity…an axiom Mr. C seems to have taken to heart. And I don’t mean Mr. Claus…

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